I said I was ready for the challenges of 2019. I meant it.
But my god, is it hard.
What’s worse than feeling sick yourself is knowing your child feels sick. Aside from the multi-vomit incidents, there’s the generally agitated behaviour, lack of appetite and lack of sleep.
This is a screenshot of my FitBit’s sleep tracker when my son was sick not too long ago. It is not inaccurate.
I’m not complaining though. This is what I signed up for. I want to care for my child when he’s sick.
What I don’t want is a lack of understanding from my employers.
“We need to discuss why you’re performance is so poor.”
“Unfortunately the statistics don’t lie.” You’re clearly not hitting your quality targets.”
Balancing parenting with home improvement over the last year has just been too difficult. My career is pretty much in tatters at this point and the risk of being let go is never far off the horizon.
I’ve been trying my best to maintain a more positive attitude this year. I keep using motivational tools to fuel me through. Things are just really tough.
I mean of course they are. No working parent ever expects things to be easy. I just wish employers could show a little more sympathy.
In the meantime, I’m devoting all my energy into being a good husband and father. I’m no longer wasting it seeking approval in a management structure that lacks both tolerance and compassion.
I’ll keep putting my family ahead of my job. Because when I’m 90 years old, I’ll care about my accomplishments as a human being more than my accomplishments as a company man.
These are my priorities.
And I’m not changing them.